Dear Pete.
So many things have changed since you’ve been gone. The main thing quite clearly being you.
But soon we’re all going to be moving. Moving from the last place any of us saw you. I feel like it’s the right time now, and I’m ready to move but at the same time terrified at the prospect.
Your parents are moving further away, I’m really gonna miss them. The chats with your mum and constant banter with your dad. Plus we’re all leaving pet cemetery behind! I hope the new owners don’t dig up the garden 🤪. Living by myself is going to be far to quiet to begin with.
I’m gonna really miss your girls and sister, miss them popping in after school and driving us all loopy! Gonna miss there cuddles and the cheekiness. But hopefully they will visit me still. I promise I’ll always look out for your girls Pete, they mean the world to me to.
I’m gutted your gonna miss the new Gavin and Stacey episode at Christmas, seems so stupid but that’s one of the first things I thought of when you died. But it was one of our things hey!
I even watched the sodding football the other night, you would of hated watching it with me though, I asked to many questions! Your dad gets way to into it to! But I did learn stuff, who knew they change goals at half time 😂
Im poorly at the moment, I know you would of had me at the doctors a week ago but your not here so you can’t tell me off! I’ll be alright, I’m dosed up and sporting a fetching mask (stop laughing!)😬.
It’s 92 days till Christmas, and by now we would of listened to the Christmas album about 60 times already 🤭 I feel really odd about it all at the moment, like the excitement is there but I feel so guilty for feeling it! How is it fair to you for me to enjoy myself right now?!
I know you would want me to but it just doesn’t seem right. I have bought some Christmas decks though… and your not here to stop me having my pink palace anymore sooooo 🤷🏼♀️
Daisy is excited to help me make my bedroom fit for a princess and she wants to decorate the Christmas tree with me. She misses you lots to! We all do.
I feel like this is the only way I can talk to you freely right now. Not sure if it helps or not but it gets it out of my head for a bit.
I know you would want me to carry on living for you, but I have to tell you it’s incredibly hard and I’m honestly not sure if I can do.
I’m trying though. Always trying. Always for you.
I love you so much babe. I hope you still know that. Always & Forever. Hannah xxx
