I don’t think people talk about this enough. Ever since I was a little girl I wanted to be a mum, playing mums and dads and forever taking on that role. The first time someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up I remember telling them I wanted to be a …
Continue reading “I don’t think this is talked about enough..”
Grief is such a timeless thing. It’s an agonising pain that rips your body apart time and time again, feelings of what ifs, what should be and what was. Life changes, it moves forward. Because it has to. You can sit still and spend painful hours living in those moments but ultimately you have to …
Its the weeks that lead up to to the anniversary and the weeks after that I struggle with most. The day comes and goes and it’s a mix of making it through and being distracted to cope. The day itself is the easiest part, some remember, some don’t. But enough remember to keep you going. …
Sat on a moving train trying so hard to stop the tears behind my sunglasses isn’t how I wanted my Easter Monday to be. I can’t quite describe the pain and upset I’ve been in for around 9 months now, only since Christmas it’s become so overwhelming I couldn’t keep it hidden anymore. The urges …
Tonight I’m not sure I wanted to write necessarily but I needed to get this out. It’s been 2 years and 3 months since losing Pete. Not a day goes by where I don’t think about him or miss him and nothing will ever take away my heart fully from him. But as time has …
Leading on from my last post. The rest of last year was a blur of lockdowns on and off, trying to cope with constant rules and changes. And learning to survive on my own. I have been involved in AFCB’s talking cherries mental health initiative from the get go and was so grateful for there …
I thought it was time to give my blog a little update considering it’s been just over a year since I last posted. Heads up in advance, this could be a long one! I guess the most obvious place to start here is covid 😬 I spent the first 6 weeks by myself, didn’t leave …
I’ve been wanting to write about this for a while now, but it’s taken a long time to take it all in. We had Petes inquest in December. When Pete died some of us had to give statements to the police, me because I was the last to see and speak to him alive. And …
Since losing Pete I have noticed many people say the same things to you. Understandably these things are what I would of said to someone to before hand. But since losing Pete in the circumstances I did and the fact he was my fiancé I wanted to talk through a few to explain why sometimes …
Dear Pete. Today marks one year since the last overdose which didn’t work. I remember waking up to you unconscious next to me in bed, and the really sad part is I wasn’t even surprised. It had become something that happened often enough that it was almost normal. I hate saying that but it’s the …
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